1. There’s a rosary hanging from the rear-view mirror.
Just keep it on a short leash, like the one in this picture, or you risk losing an eye. Sure, if you’re going to blind yourself permanently you might as well do it with a very small crucifix, but still.
2. You can’t fit into one parking space.
Vantastic.
3. You have at least one pro-life bumper sticker…
…but you don’t necessarily stop there.
Our pro-life message: “Yes, they’re all ours, and no, we’re not done.”
4. You have a carpet of old church bulletins instead of floor mats.
And sure enough, your parish, just like every other parish in the country, consists entirely of realtors, dentists, and painters.
5. You prominently display a St. Christopher prayer card and/or visor clip.
Who cares if he was a myth? He was manly. He probably smelled like bacon and fresh lumber.
6. Your number one pre-set station is Catholic Radio.
Because even Journey can get old sometimes.
7. You have an entire row of car seats.
And none of them are this clean, ever.
8. Your air freshener is a miniature incense thurible.
Okay, I made that one up. But if they made those, you know you would get one.
9. Your car looks like this.
In which case, thanks for reading.