Category Archives: Humor

Vatican Unveils New Tank

ROME — In a surprise press conference yesterday, high-ranking Vatican official Cardinal Giacomo Tortellini announced that the Vatican has been developing a new main battle tank. “As Prefect for the Congregation of Defense, I felt it was necessary to take concrete action to protect the Holy See from her enemies.  This is the first new […]

What Did Mother Assumpta Say to Philip Rivers?

This picture of Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist’s Mother Assumpta and San Diego Chargers quarterback Philip Rivers is popping up all over Facebook with requests for a caption. What did Mother say to the Catholic quarterback? A few ideas … “Seek out the lonely, the open, and throw no longer to the double-covered.” […]

Synod’s Final Report Already Written By Bon Jovi

ROME — During a press conference this morning, the Secretary General of the Synod on the Family, Cardinal Lorenzo Baldiserri, along with Archbishop Bruno Forte, confirmed rumors that the Relatio Synodi, or the final document of the synod, has already been written. “We have decided to bypass the traditional rules governing the order in which […]

‘You Know You’re a Catholic If …’ Summer 2015 Edition

Dr. Edward Mulholland at the Gregorian Institute helped me compile this list of ways you can tell you are Catholic in these tumultuous times. You know you are a Catholic in the summer of 2015 if … 10. You recently started using the term “matrimony” instead of “marriage.”   9. You have friends who just changed […]

Catholic Hardware Store Sued for Refusing to Sell Gay Extension Cord

The Catholic owners of “Joe’s Hardware” in Atchison, Kansas are defending themselves against a federal lawsuit that accuses them of violating equal protection laws because they refused to sell a same-sex extension cord to a customer last month. The plaintiff in the lawsuit is Flip Rosco, a poodle trainer from Greenwich Village.  During a press […]

A Look Back: Democrats Doing Ordinary Things

  Democrats tailgating before a football game.  How ’bout another beer, Vern?   Democrats demonstrating fire safety procedures. Yaaay safety!   Democrat students getting a little rowdy during the college marble tournament.   Young woman so excited to be a Democrat.  Groovy times.   Helpful young Democrat directing pedestrians to the candy store.   Democrats […]

This Is Not ‘The Encyclical’ You Were Looking For (But It’s Funny)

Courtesy of Observatório do Clima, a nonprofit based in Brazil, that advocates for action on climate change. Pope Francis’ real encyclical on the environment is released worldwide on June 18, and as with most things, it probably won’t live up to the hype of the trailer (or the hype, in general). But, enjoy: Image: YouTube screenshot […]

10 Encyclicals for Boys the Pope Should Consider

With all the talk and preparation for the encyclical on the environment due out this month, my sons and I (well, three of the littler ones) were talking about what encyclicals the Pope would write if he had to target just boys instead of adults. Here are 10 we thought would be helpful …. 10. A Duty […]

Stuff Catholic Dads Say

From what I understand of the “stuff dads say” genre, created originally by Justin Halpern, it is an opportunity to showcase the harsh worldly wise style of fathers. This is the harsh churchly wise version. Feel free to add more in the comments …   At Mass “Look at Jesus on the altar … or […]



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