Memo to the Vatican: Save the Doves!

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As if we needed any more proof that it’s time to end the silly practice of releasing doves as a symbol of promoting peace, two more poor birds were subjected to a violent assault this weekend in St. Peter’s Square.

The event terrified and needlessly traumatized thousands of innocent children who witnessed it take place.

Let’s recap what happened.

It started off like this:

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 7.41.42 PM

Okay, so far so good.

Everyone is expecting this:

When doves fly

Or maybe this:

doves1

Or, at the very least, this:

doves3

Instead we get this:

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 7.42.02 PM

…why does that crow have its mouth open?

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 7.42.20 PM

Oh good heavens! This doesn’t look good at all!

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 7.42.36 PM

This is downright terrifying. Oh, the humanity! What have we done?!

If the doves managed to escape, they’re missing some feathers.

It’s probably a merciful thing that doves can’t scream, otherwise I think we could all imagine the soundtrack that would’ve accompanied this little shop of horrors.

But this isn’t the first time this has happened.

A couple years ago a dove released by Pope Benedict was attacking the exact same fashion:

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 7.56.49 PM

You can watch a video of the terrified animal trying to flee if you wish:

The news must have spread in the avian community, because the next time around, the doves actually refused to leave the papal apartment and can be seen in this video desperately flying back into the papal residence to avoid being eaten!

So basically, if you have a pair of wings, this is the most terrifying sight in the world:

Screen Shot 2014-01-26 at 8.15.45 PM

Look, releasing a pair of doves doesn’t promote peace in the Ukraine.

It’s more like ringing the dinner bell.

Praying for peace actually promotes peace.

So let’s save some doves and let’s stop traumatizing the kids:

No more!!!

The views expressed here are those of the author, and do not necessarily represent the views of CatholicVote.org

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About Author

Thomas Peters grew up in Southern California and attended college in Michigan. He has two graduate degrees in theology. He began his award-winning American Papist blog in 2006 and has been proud to be a part of the CV team since 2010. He was one of a handful of American bloggers invited to the Vatican’s first-ever Bloggers’ Meeting in Rome. Peters has appeared in dozens of TV, radio and online media outlets over the years discussing and debating the intersection of Catholicism and politics, as well as pro-life and pro-family activism, in addition to writing and speaking about the future of social media and youth activism. You can follow Thomas Peters at @AmericanPapist.

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