Public Service Announcement: MEAT FRIDAY!

Because I am lazy (note how frequently I post) and because I love meat, I am resurrecting a post from the last 2 years.

Also, Pope Francis wants you to eat meat today.  He called me and told me in very broken English to tell everyone at Ca-toh-leak Boat. 

You can follow me on Twitter @MeatFriday.  Don’t be alarmed that barely anyone is following me yet. It’ll be fine.  Seriously.  Just get into my van. 

If you follow me, I promise to tweet funny things.  Enjoy!

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If you’re like me and you hate fish – and seafood, shellfish, anything that tastes anything like fish (no, it doesn’t taste like chicken – stop with that) – then generally Friday’s are sort of miserable.

Looks delicious, doesn’t it?

My Friday diet tends to be composed of pasta, peanut butter and other carbohydrate things that make me fat. And let’s face it, they don’t taste anywhere near as good as meat.

My favorite things to eat are things that once had hooves and talons, not scales and slime. I fantasize about working at a butcher shop and cutting meat with giant knives and bandsaws. One Easter, I had to use a hacksaw to cut through the femur on a leg of pork (yes, I am that manly).

This is probably what Heaven is like.

I must note that I am deeply grateful that our Lord and Savior did not consecrate fish at the Last Supper or I would probably now be a Unitarian.

Luckily for me (and for you), a few glorious Fridays per year are also Solemnities on our Liturgical Calendar. Now as we all know, Solemnities are days of Feasting not Fasting. They are days for celebration and not penance. Being a confirmed fish-hater, I take particular delight in the celebration of these days of Solemnity.

I like to call them “Meat Fridays.” They are those high Holy Days that get me off the hook from abstaining from meat. Aren’t you impressed that I can find a way to make a feast of the Catholic Church all about me? I am a bad Catholic.

Anyway, today, Friday in the Octave of Easter, is happily one of those days. The Solemnity of the Resurrection is so awesome that it lasts for 8 days!

Meat can even make Star Trek appealing.

So, put a thick steak on the grill or fry some bacon.

Feed the fish to a cat and embrace your Catholic identity!

Patrick Thornton has a real job (sort of). He likes eating meat and vegetables flavored with meat. Under the name Archbishop LeGrille, he once wrote about a theology of grilling for which he was labeled a manifest heretic by John White and other dumb friends. The views expressed here may or may not be his own. It depends who’s asking.

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Categories:Humor

15 thoughts on “Public Service Announcement: MEAT FRIDAY!

  1. jgbech says:

    Back in the 60s baseball announcer and former Yankee great Phil Rizzuto said one Friday from the booth… “just look at all those fans eating hotdogs on a Friday”. Phil was so ensconced in Italian Catholicism he forgot where he was. I’m sure that most fans listening were not sure what he meant. I was.

    For decades I’ve been saying that we need more positive and less negative input from church. Imagine, with the magnitude of serious problems we need to be threatened by eating a staple on Friday. WOW!

  2. Jackie S says:

    I love the idea of sacrificing meat for lent, but I also feel like the whole aspect of sacrifice brings a dark aspect upon the church. There is so much emphasis on sacrificing instead of celebrating. I think that the days of Solemnity bring people to want to celebrate and be in union, instead of pushing them away. It brings out a lighter and brighter side of what is being celebrated.

    1. Kevin G says:

      Then do both something positive AND something, er… “dark”. In any regard, da rules is da rules.

  3. Raunel Urquiza says:

    I advocate the sacrifice of meat on fridays. In the time of Jesus bread and fish were part of the staple diet. On Fridays those who choose to give up meat are not only living out their faith through their catholic beliefs but they are also trying to be one with Jesus Christ. It is so natural for us to eat Fish on fridays during lent because fish has been a symbol for chistians since the time of Jesus. Fish was a secret symbol to show the community that that residence was celebrating the living tradition of Christians.

  4. Ryan Dooling says:

    I really like the aspect of no meat fridays because it creates of oneness among the people. Everyone can participate and feel a sense of belonging because there our others doing it as well, even if it is a struggle.

  5. RMT says:

    I, too, used to dislike seafood because my mother hated it and never wanted it in the house, but I trained myself to like it–here’s how:

    I chose to give up meat as my lenten sacrifice, and determined that fish would be a part of that penance.
    I started with the “lighter” tasting fish, in small portions, and usually disguised heavily with seasoning.
    Eventually doing this during Lent every year, and finding different recipes to try, I started to like the taste and didn’t need as much seasoning anymore

    Now I am a Friday and Lenten fish convert and I eat it at other times throughout the year ;)

    1. M Sully says:

      Good for you! I love salmon and other types of fish. Also, grilled cheese and cheese pizza are good things to eat on Fridays in lent.
      I think that the sacrafices we make really help us become in communion with God, ourselves, others, and nature. Nature because we save the lives of red meat animals during lent.

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