Top 10 Reasons Why God Let Tim Tebow Lose

flickr, Stefan Ralle

“If God doesn’t let a sparrow fall without his knowing it, do you think he pays no attention as Tim Tebow’s passes fall?” So said Benedictine College’s Vaughn Kohler, former Baptist minister and new Catholic commentator, at work last week.

He was joking, but of course he has a point. After the nation watched “God’s Quarterback” stumble in the playoffs against the Patriots, here are 10 reasons God allowed this to come to pass. (With thanks to Dr. Edward Mulholland for his contribution.)

10. Because he didn’t want Christians to downgrade him from “Lord of the Universe” to “Best Assistant Coach in the NFL.”

9. Because Rob Gronkowski’s Polish grandmother said five Rosaries for the Patriots.

8. Because God is really good at bringing good out of suffering.

7. Because God didn’t want kids who admire Tom Brady to think he’s out to get their hero.

6. Because once 30 million people saw the Focus on the Family ad, the game was won from God’s perspective.

5. When Tebow threw 316 yards to win against the Steelers, God wanted us to read John 3:16. Yesterday, he threw 136 yards. John 1:36 is part of today’s Gospel– “As he watched Jesus walk by, he said ‘Behold the Lamb of God.’”

4. Because God wants kids to learn to work hard and wait for good things, not just pray and get them now.

3. Because when God became man, he “lost” in the world’s eyes, too.

2. Because Tom Brady’s performance better reflected God’s glory … because it was awesome, not awkward.

1. To remind us that almost everything in our lives is more important than football.

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5 thoughts on “Top 10 Reasons Why God Let Tim Tebow Lose

  1. David says:

    I don’t know why people put so much thought into seemingly random numbers. 316 was bound to come up sooner or later. I would be something if it came up consistently or if the occurence of the number coincided with a prediction of that exact number or some other event of similar magnitude but that is not the case.

    For comparison I was arguing with a protestant about how many books belong in the Bible. They said 66 and I said 73. Later that day my wife’s father convinced us to go with him to the race track as a family outing and my wife ignored my objections.

    I don’t like gambling so I said I would only bet 100 yen. I predicted we were doomed to fail and loose money, it was guaranteed because of the way gambling worked and proceeded to keep a tally of all money lost for the day. I did that to show that simply going to a game center or the movies would have been a better use of time.

    For my bet I insisted that the number 7 horse would be first and the number 3 horse would be second, in reference to my earlier argument.

    The machine didn’t take the bet. We tried again but the the machine didn’t take the bet so we got the staff to help. The staff couldn’t get the machine to take the bet so they had to do it the old fashioned way on the manual machine. Finally I got my ticket and had to wait two long, boring hours for my race to come up.

    Finally the race came up and I was so busy with my kids I didn’t even watch it. I just figured I would loose.

    Well, I didn’t loose. Seven came in first and three came in second. This actually annoyed me, I was the only one who won a bet and I didn’t even like gambling. I was becoming an enabling example.

    Well I figured one 100 yen bet that I would win maybe about 500 yen, roughly $5. But somehow it turned out that the number seven horse had just won its first race ever, so it was an unknown horse. The number three horse was a constant looser. So instead of winning $5 I won more than $500.

    So there you go, my gambling experience proves that there should be 73 books in the Bible and that protestants should convert to Catholicism.

    And I never went back to the race track and to this day I am a net winner.

    1. Dan F. says:

      Awesome. That’s about all to which any argument about significant numbers usually amounts.

  2. Mike the (Converted) Geek says:

    How about that God’s will most times is for matter and energy in space and time behave according to their natures, which effectively translates to “Brady wins.”

  3. John Jakubczyk says:

    Actually the number one reason is so Tim Tebow can go to the March for Life o January 23, 2012, meet Eduardo Verastagui and conspire to bring all soul to Christ.

  4. Jennifer Roche says:

    This is a great post that made me smile. Very cute and witty!

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