Worst Idea Ever?! Teenage Girls Trained to Perform Exorcisms

This has to be one of the stupidest idea I’ve come across in a long time. And the UK Daily Mail‘s inept, sensationalist reporting of the story only makes things worse:

‘We’re not like normal teenagers’: Meet the exorcist schoolgirls who spend their time casting out DEMONS around the world

# Brynne Larson, 16, is one of many newly-qualified teenage demon slayers
# Reverend Bob Larson of Spiritual Freedom Churches runs exorcist school
# No set protocol for exorcisms but girls carry a Bible, holy water and a cross

How you can combine the words “qualified”, “teenage”, and “demon slayers” in the same sentence escapes me. I’m hoping the Daily Mail is just having some fun with this.

And that’s precisely the problem, because exorcism isn’t child’s play. It’s deathly serious.

But I can’t force myself to turn away from this train wreck. So here goes:

The five teenage girls might look like they’re in a normal class, eagerly reading their textbooks and answering their teacher’s questions diligently.

But the textbooks are Bibles and the girls all have crosses instead of protractors, as they train to become exorcists – real exorcists who fight demons, curses and evil spells.

‘People do look a bit surprised when I arrive,’ admits graduate exorcist Brynne Larson. ‘When people call for an exorcist, they don’t picture a 16-year-old high school girl.’

NO KIDDING. I’d be concerned too! (I should say this up front – if you think you have a need for an exorcist, call your local diocese ASAP).

But Brynne, from Phoenix, Arizona, is one of a new breed of qualified teenage demon slayers, who answered a call when the Church made the admission of there being a worldwide exorcist shortage.

But despite drastic efforts, supply has still not met demand for the controversial ceremony.

“The Church” of course actually refers to the Catholic Church – i.e., the Church founded by Christ and invested with the spiritual authority to cast out demons in His name. When the Church says we need more exorcists – they weren’t calling for an influx of teenage girls led by an opportunistic protestant:

So if the forces of darkness start getting the upper hand, who should you call? Evangelist Reverend Bob Larson of Spiritual Freedom Churches International – and his remarkable school for exorcists.

‘Think of it more of an exorcist franchise,’ Rev Larson tells MailOnline exclusively.

‘Our phone lines are ringing constantly – we receive up to 1,000 individual requests monthly, and we travel to countries like Africa, Ukraine, England and even Australia.’

‘We have found that our female, teenage exorcists are particularly effective at curing the possessed,’ says Rev Larson, whose daughter Brynne is a supernaturally talented exorcist.

Seriously?

There’s nothing in my understanding of demonic possession and the Church’s exorcism ministry that suggests teenage girls should be sent into circumstances of possible demonic possession or oppression. In fact it seems to invite more harm.

It’s hard for me to even take this all seriously, but the Daily Mail article does stake a claim (sorry, I couldn’t resist) that this phenomenon (I mean of this international protestant exorcism ministry) is real.

Maybe the only way to conclude this — besides praying for the people mentioned in this story and hoping that more people become aware of the Church’s actual exorcism ministry — is to let the Taiwanese news animators have the last word:

3,613 views

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20 thoughts on “Worst Idea Ever?! Teenage Girls Trained to Perform Exorcisms

  1. Richard C. says:

    That name rings a bell. …. Yep: it’s that Bob Larson, who had a call-in Christian talk radio show for 20 years. Now he’s doing “ministry” and making reality TV shows. Oy.

    Anyway, thanks for posting the Taiwanese video: they sure know how to cover these “odd news” stories!

  2. K Nitsuko says:

    Worst Idea Ever? The Catholic Church continuing to peddle the idea that demonic possession is real. This prevents psychologically disturbed people from getting actual medical treatment that could help them.

    1. Lucy says:

      K Nitsuko, I couldn’t agree more. Talk about living in the dark ages. The idea of demonic possession comes from a lack of understanding of cause and effect regarding the human mind. Imagine Thomas stating that God has chosen the Catholic Church to cast out demons. That’s like saying God has chosen the Catholic Church to never understand the complexity of the human mind and rather, to live in the dark ages forever. Brilliant!

    2. Paul Sadek says:

      If you had any idea of what the Catholic Church “peddles,” then you would be aware of the fact that the Church always rules out natural causes FIRST, before even considering an exorcism. If you think that anyone can just call their parish priest to make an appointment for an exorcism, you need to do better research before writing.

      1. davide says:

        Lucy you’re back!!! I missed your heterophobic rants. Why you commenting here? This isn’t about homosexual advocacy. BTW you and your anti-Catholic bigot friend Paul knows nothing about exorcism if you had you would understand it better than what you seen at the movie theater. Really lame. See you Liza oops Lucy

        1. Lucy says:

          davide, thank-you for missing me. And for the record, I don’t advocate homosexual life styles. I advocate their right to enter into a marriage contract like anyone else. I also believe that Priests and Nuns should have this right. And trust me, I know all about exorcisms. and the archaic belief in the existence of the devil.

      2. Scott W. says:

        Exactly Paul. The LAST thing a bishop wants is a serious case of posession in his diocese and will use every means to rule it out before permitting exorcism. In fact, one of the complaints is that afaik, every diocese is suppose to have a designated exorcist but many bishops leave this role unfilled.

        1. Scott S says:

          And what did the Catholic Church do to people with multiple personality disorder, manic depression, schizophrenia, and autism before we understood those diseases? Yup, they tried to cast out the demons by performing exorcisms. If a Bishop is “ruling out natural causes” first, and STILL thinks that a person is possessed, it’s just that the person has a mental disorder that we don’t understand yet. C’mon people, it’s 2011 already, they aren’t possessed by the devil.

          1. Scott W. says:

            And what did doctors do before they understood germs and bacteria? They bled them. And until very recently, they treated mental diseases by shocking them. To call this proof against the existence of posession is begging the question.

          2. Amanda says:

            As people have already pointed out, the Church first rules out natural/psychological causes before performing exorcisms. It seems you are suggesting that people can’t be possessed because it’s 2011. Satan still exists, you know.

          3. Scott W. says:

            Exactly Amanda. Catholics are often accused of being rigid and doctrinaire, but cosider this: My mother died of cancer and the doctors tried their best, but couldn’t do anything to save her. My wife has a superior at her work who has been diagnosed with cancer and he’s been given the option of A.) staying on the meds that are extending his life, but won’t cure the inevitable B.) enter a clinical study in which he has to go off the life-extending meds and let researchers use him as guinea pig–even to the possibility of being the one given the placebo. Now imagine doctor A saying: “Obviously you have a difficult choice to make. I would also recommend prayer and getting your affairs in order, and I’d understand if you sought out alternative medicine.” and Doctor B who says, “Obviously you have a difficult choice to make, but WHATEVER you do, don’t pray, ask others to pray, seek out the sacraments or use sacramentals [and that is what exocism is btw, a sacramental embodying the prayer of the entire Church and invested in a specific rite), or try alternative medicine because that is archaic nonsense.” Now, which one is being rigid and doctrinaire? In other words, I’m open-minded enought to enjoy the benefits of science and medicine AND the benefits of prayer and faith as opposed to going into a tizzy by deviating one milimeter from the secularist creed.

  3. LaJuan says:

    Amen to V.C. above and also, if they think Satan and his demons are something to play with, they better think again. As you said, this is deathly serious stuff. I am sure the Devil is having a good laugh and enjoying all this attention immensely.

  4. Kathy Schiffer says:

    Only five girls? Where’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer? (Perhaps she works for the competiton.)

    Heaven help us.

  5. DAVIDE says:

    @Of course this stupid idea. But I hope they take a video camera with them. The first time these teenage girls see a possessed person they going to [edited] run out. This should not be taken seriously, its nothing more than a comedy sketch. How they going to exercize the demon out? Annoy them with their gossip and text messages? Threaten a bikini and eyebrow waxing? Seriously this could be a fun thing to see-hope it makes You Tube.

  6. Vernacular Catholic says:

    If Reverend Bob Larson of Spiritual Freedom Churches truly believed in demonic possession and the power of exorcism then he wouldn’t be sending teenage girls in harm’s way. Who do they think they are? Buffy?
    This is a scam. 1,000 requests per month from all over the world? I wonder what they charge!

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