That Didn’t Take Long: Praising Multi-Spouse Marriage

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Same-sex “marriage” proponents have always scoffed at the idea that redefining marriage would open the door for multi-spouse marriages. “My Two Husbands” by Angi Becker Stevens, not only argues for “poly-amorous” unions but continues to scoff at the foolish “right wing” people who expected people to go there. Her article is novel only in that it also scoffs at the same-sex marriage definers who argued back that it wouldn’t.

Stevens has been married for 16 years to her husband, and has now taken a boyfriend who she says she plans to marry in a “non-legal” way.

“With every stride forward for marriage equality, I can count on turning on the TV to find conservative talking heads lumping families like mine in with pedophilia and bestiality. But liberals, for the most part, don’t treat us much better. They’re quick to insist that same-sex marriage would never, ever lead to such awful things.”

The author uses her 9-year-old daughter to deflect criticism. Her daughter dutifully and understandably repeats the adult arguments for same-sex marriage and applies them to her family.

“When my daughter talks about same-sex marriage or polyamorous relationships, she always looks perplexed and says, ‘I don’t understand why anyone is angry about people being in love and not hurting anyone.’ And I long for a world where everyone is able to see it so simply.

And later …

“Whenever I mention the claims that polyamory is bad for children, she rolls her eyes and says, ‘Oh no, kids having more people to love them! How horrible!’”

In the style of such articles, the author doesn’t make a case against monogamous marriage on principle, or for multi-spouse “marriage” on principle. Instead, she presents the facts of a particular situation as a fait accompli and challenges you to argue why it is not so. She felt repressed before and says “I am more fulfilled now and living in a way that feels authentic for me.”

Apply a simple thought experiment, and her argument starts to wither. Imagine the article being written by a man bringing a “girlfriend” into his life and convincing his wife to tolerate it. Or imagine a Mormon talking about his repressed relationship with God instead of a political activist talking about her repressed human relationships. Salon wouldn’t have published those pieces.

But they did publish this one.

Because “love makes a marriage” now. And to say otherwise means you’re a hater.

For the record: I love these people. I wish them all the best in their personal lives. But I oppose multi-spouse marriage anyway.

The views expressed here are those of the author, and do not necessarily represent the views of CatholicVote.org

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About Author

Tom Hoopes, author of What Pope Francis Really Said, is writer in residence at Benedictine College, in Atchison, Kansas, where he teaches in the Journalism and Mass Communications Department and edits The Gregorian, a Catholic identity speech digest. He was previously editor of the National Catholic Register for 10 years and with his wife, April, of Faith & Family magazine for five. A frequent contributor to Catholic publications, he began his career as a reporter in the Washington, D.C., area and as press secretary for U.S. House Ways & Means Chairman Bill Archer. He lives in Atchison with his wife and those of his nine children still at home. The views and opinions expressed on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of Benedictine College or the Gregorian Institute.

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